(An hour ago, you were using a vibrator in ????????, ??????? pretty easily. You get dressed as you hear the door open, your roommate coming in the house.)

"Oh, hey!"

(He speaks with a smirk on his face, looking down at his phone.)

(He sounds you out for groceries... and when you come back home, he has a massive 9" pink ????? out of his pants.)

"I caught a little... picture of you."

(He shows a picture of it...)

(He's drunk out of his ??????' mind.)